Who is Mrs Palmer & her 5 daughters?

Heya all,

Updating this in late 2020 as originally written in 2013’ish. It was a bit rough as originally published but is coming together with this update.



Hi all,

May I introduce Mrs Palmer (being my trusty right hand palm) and her five daughters (being thine fingers that grip thy shaft so well).

Masturbation. Where would I be without thee?

And the answer. Basically up shit’s creek – without a paddle!

Finding sexual partners has always been an uphill battle for moi and so I regularly default to the reliable (and healthy) option as the rule rather than exception, which may well be your pleasure modality of choice also?

I used to be able to “spank the monkey” numerous times a day and still exercise but I must admit to slowing down as I get older.

A quick calculation which may gross some of you out but is interesting to me.

Working on 5ml of ejaculate per session (which I think is the average amount expressed during the male orgasm) and multiplying that out over the years I have defaulted to dear Mrs Palmer’s pleasure solution, I get a whopping 6+ litres of semen that has left my body headed for most usually my belly, followed closely by a tissue.

That is a lot of semen and sperm!

And before you ask, am I addicted to masturbation?

I dont know. I dont think so but I have noticed that my ability to orgasm with a woman is getting harder as the years go by.

And I have contemplated this and come to the conclusion that a bird in the hand is the better strategy for me because I am yet to find a woman on this planet who matches my hedonistic mindset.

She is a rare beast it seems.

Anyway, there’s my 1c’s worth on masturbation.

I hope it helps you accept that there is absolutely nothing wrong with self pleasure.

And with that, its time to lie back and have some fun.



Norhtwestern Uni and the live sex demo…


This is an oldie (March 2011) but it popped up again on twitter so I thought I would grasp it and write my thoughts down.
I am actually in favour of this sort of thing. It was conducted professionally with consenting adults in front of consenting students who chose to stay after class as they were interested in learning about BDSM.

As you will read, no one got up and left or complained when it was made clear that things would be getting graphic so yes, I fully support this sort of hands on education as a part of the whole learning process.

This is why I support better sex education in schools conducted at a young age through the high school years (sorry, don’t know the equivalent in the States?) which would teach young people very slowly about the human body and its sexual functions. Classes could still stay mixed up until a point but there would be some classes I think that would be better conducted by a teacher and an aide of the same sex as the students.

I honestly believe this type of education would have a flow-on effect in the wider community and I hope this would mean fewer assaults of a sexual nature and maybe even would change enough attitudes to lower rates of sexual harassment?

Tis genuinely food for thought…