Happening review – sex and abortion on the new frontline in 60s France (via Guardian Australia).

Hi all,

This looks good.

And Happening is especially relevant at the moment with Texas and its new laws regarding abortion.

In Australia, the backwater that it can be at times, we also have a conservative government who can’t or won’t get its collective (pardon my use of that word. I understand it doesn’t apply to conservatives) head around women and their place as equals in society.

Check out the review above and maybe it appeals, or maybe not?

Either way, it highlights an issue we very much need to confront and work through in both genders.

Adios
AES

Ani DiFranco – Tiptoe

I walked 6km’s in the Hawaiian sun to buy this album “Living In Clip” which I had heard first on 3RRR Melbourne – Off The Record (Saturday morning’s at 9am).

It was so worth it.

OnlyFans to ban adult material…WTF!

Update 25th Aug – decision to remove pornographic material has been suspended…

Hi all,

You may have missed this or maybe not. I didnt.

Firstly, I will admit to never venturing onto Only Fans but I am clear in understanding it to be a step forward for humanity in finally acknowledging our rampant sexuality and hitting online free porn with a sharp uppercut in the process.

As Tim says below, it enabled sex-workers and other individuals to monetise their art safely and also as I have said above, hitting back at free-porn (which is an indidious evil run by a handful of individuals that exists only to exploit people and is I would contend not a step in the right direction for sexual freedom and individual liberties).

If you’ve never heard of OnlyFans at all, it’s a site where people share images and video, which fans can access after paying a certain amount per month. It’s become popular with sex workers and online performers because it allows them to build a safe relationship with fans without having to just upload their work to the public internet. Of course, it’s popular with fans of that kind of content too because they can support and communicate with performers directly.
It’s $US5 billion so far, $US2 billion in the last year, of which 80 per cent went to creators. But porn makes people nervous (and exposes thorny issues, with OnlyFans saying last month it deactivated 15 accounts for posting images of underage people); big investors and banks don’t want a bar of it. Like Twitch with its clothing policies or Tumblr’s anti-queer pivot in 2018, the internet loves to support sexual freedom and expression, unless it gets in the way of perpetual growth.
via The Age, Melbourne

This link from the Guardian provides an update on what happened with Only Fans and why they have taken the action they have.

And here’s another article to get you up to speed;

https://www.inputmag.com/tech/onlyfans-is-banning-porn-the-very-thing-that-made-it-big

Tumblr went the same way in cutting out sexual expression when they decided to go all draconian on creators and what they were saying through their posts.

I had a Tumblr account and I was happy to pay a price to check out sexy posts from people that had a particular sexual bent that I found interesting.

Just imagine the potential here people. If done right with the right regulation and settings in place, sites like Tumblr and Only Fans and others that have come and gone over the years might have even got as far one day to coax sexuality like beastiality and other weird shit that I personally would rather see regulated and available to those who want to pay for that stuff rather than on the dark web with us the tax-payer continually chucking cash in the law enforcement bucket to chase these evil people down and prosecute their arses only to rinse and repeat next month.

I mean, c’mon…really? Surely one day we can fucking well acknowledge who we are as humans and all the fucking weird shit that we think about and make it available for those that are interested such that people of all ages, races and cultures stop being exploited by a few rich arseholes across the world.

Is that really too much to ask?

Anyway, sorry for the rant. There’s a bit of information for you which I think clearly outlines where we are in regards to sexuality (still) and where we need to be if we are to see real change in humanity and the way we generally perceive sex.

Regards
AES

‘We always see sex from the man’s view’: Cammie Toloui, the peep show performer who peeped back (via The Guardian Australia).

Hi all

This is a fantastic article and I hope you can spare some time to read it.

For a long time its been very clear to me that human sexuality generally speaking is unbalanced and has an overall bias favouring men.

If indeed you feel this way or are willing to open you mind to the idea, then this article is for you.

I feel Cammie is speaking a truth we all need to embrace via her photos and in this article.  And its true that this embrace of truth and balance is getting stronger by the day but there’s a lot of resistance still from those whose blinkers are on for life.

And I am very strongly for our collective sexuality having more sunlight shone on it through fantastic pieces of art like this in order for the good ship S.E.X to continue making its important headway on this subject.

https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2021/aug/16/cammie-toloui-camera-sex-worker-photojournalist

Correct me if I am wrong but I think the saying is that a picture is worth a thousand words and maybe that’s the case with her book.

I will try to grab a copy but I think she has said enough for mine in the article.

Anyway, I hope you get something out of this one.

Cheers
AES

Tina Turner – Private Dancer

Times are a changin…

Hi all,

I have seen this change coming for a while so believe me when I say that having a child as a single parent or as a same-sex couple is going to be the next big thing for the matriarchy.

COVID-19 pandemic-fuelled IVF baby boom creating ‘sperm drought’ across Australia – ABC News via @inkl https://inkl.com/a/QJxnvZiLmbk

The world is clearly changing and women are slowly winning battles that will enable them to be genuine equals against the dominant gender (as things always should have been in humanity from the start but never were).

So mark my words that I definitely can see a time in the next 10 years or so when some governments swing their policies to support this now viable option in order to keep births at a sustainable replacement rate.

But where there are winners, there will also be losers and one winner from the loser category (see what I did there!) might be the incel groups who will keep growing as women tread their own path either alone or with another woman rather than a man.

As always, it makes for interesting times and I will definitely be writing more about this so if you have gotten this far, please drop by again as…

Shit’s about to get real for the patriarchy!

Regards
AES

Mr Mister, Something Real

Together apart: why sleeping in separate beds is not always the beginning of the end (via The Guardian).

Hi all,

Do you find the subject of this post  intriguing and interesting?

I did.

If you do, please click away below (and then come back…please)!!

Sleeping apart.

I’m a fan.  My partner and I have slept this way for years, namely because I snore (thankyou genetics).

And frankly it works.

Sleep is undoubtedly highly important and moreso in the busy world we all  inhabit these days where our time is continually in demand.

But what of the love and sex in the relationship?

That will obviously need to be negotiated by each couple but its definitely not insurmountable and indeed is a great way to explore your intimate communication further.

So in summary I say, think on it. 

Think of the potential positives.  There’s many.

Here’s but one.  Jazzing up your sleeping space so you can invite your lover in on occasion to share some special time knowing also that the amazing benefits of deep, unbroken precious sleep are also a precious luxury.

Kind regards
AES

Crowded House, Fingers Of Love (LIVE)

Ghislaine Maxwell began to share ‘little black book’ with Epstein as early as the 1980s (via The Guardian Aust).

Hi again all,

Men.

You don’t have to be Einstein to understand that the male gender has been responsible for so much pain and suffering towards women since time immortal.

Just try this.  As an exercise in the comprehension of this statement take the next 10-15 seconds and think about the amount of times you have heard about men behaving badly over the past 5-10 years.

And I dont mean to be awful, but if you didn’t get to five as a minimum, you haven’t been paying attention.

In getting down from my soap-box now  I will admit that I kinda understand if you couldnt recall many as I largely switch off now also. 

There’s just too many.

This list above was last updated 18 months ago…and as far as I can see is only US men!!

Then there’s the now departed Mr Epstein & Ms Maxwell.  That’s a whole other can of worms!

And why Ghislane shared the book…we may never know?

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2021/jun/27/ghislaine-maxwell-began-to-share-little-black-book-with-epstein-as-early-as-the-1980s?

And what drives this behaviour???

I genuinely dont know but I have said for a long time that testosterone, the male sex hormone clearly needs to be understood better…by everyone. 

And…

#STAT

I think its fair to say that most men including yours truly only barely understands it’s power.

One thought (read potential solution) I have entertained for a while would be for each gender to wear patches containing the opposite sex’s hormone for a short time at the appropriate time during their development (if indeed there is an appropriate time as each gender develops?).

I am no scientist but just maybe this would help the level of understanding  and in doing so assist us to reduce the incidence of harassment, associated sex crimes and general bastardry we impart on women as we men grow up.

Clearly though, we need to keep moving forward on this massive problem that potentially ends in a similar way to that reported in my last post.

And that, dear readers is a bloody sad &  sorry situation.

WE CAN AND MUST DO BETTER.

AES

Clamping koala: how a new sex guide prompted complaints – and delight (via The Guardian).

How good are the Norwegians?

In my mind, utterly brilliant.  Now lets contrast that with conservative Australia.

OMG…shit would get real for our public broadcaster if they made and distributed something like this.  I can just imagine the hoo-haa that Murdoch media (the city papers, SKY, city radio stations (AM) etc.) would drum up.

That said SBS Australia is known for its risque programming so maybe there is some hope there after all.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/jun/21/clamping-koala-how-a-new-sex-guide-prompted-complaints-and-delight

Anyway, I am just glad someone is talking about sexuality as that’s the only way we move forward as a species.

Enjoy
AES

Thomas Brand on Polyamory (via Medium).

Hi all,

I had moved away from poly for a few reasons but then tonight I read this article by Thomas and I think I need to revisit The Ethical Slut soon for a refresh.

Back in the day I used to think polyamory was the next big thing but that time came & went (in Australia specifically) with the default in marriage staying the course as the default long-term relationship option.


Polyamory isnt dead yet though and I really hope it hangs around because I feel its time will come again as both genders methodically find solutions to problems that have and still constrain gender balance.

I see traditional marriage as big supporter of gender inequality but that said I am sure there are many great examples of marriage that show it in a better light.

Anyway, this article will provide you with a small window into the world of the polyamourous via one of the many emotional mines on the minefield of love that can stop a polyamourous relationship in its tracks. 

Compersion; is defined in the Urban Dictionary as:
A feeling of joy when a loved one invests in and takes pleasure from another romantic or sexual relationship“.
Thomas discusses compersion and in doing so will take you in a journey about commitment, patience and empathy for your significant other.

https://link.medium.com/JWuaE93pOgb

Compersion


Anyhoo, I hope you click through (see my p.s. below first) and until next time peeps, keep living & loving like there’s no tomorrow.

Here’s a bit of QOTSA to get you in a loving mood.

I wanna make it wit chu

AES

p.s. Medium is a subscriber based site so you are going to have to cough up some cash to read the main link.

I reckon its completely worth it as Medium is chock full of brainy goodness, but that’s your call.

Chanel Contos to meet Scott Morrison to discuss sex consent education reforms (via The Guardian Australia).

Yes, yes, yes, yes…more…more…
give me more…

not sex, but education!

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2021/may/21/chanel-contos-to-meet-scott-morrison-to-discuss-sex-consent-education-reforms

Hi all,

This young woman is bloody amazing IMHO.  She has the potential to push a stalled agenda along in a way it hasnt been for years.

That said, I doubt that we will see anything from the PM, because he’s clearly all about short termism and holding onto the prime ministership.

And politics and ideology unfortunately gets in the way of so many great ideas and movements but you know, it never totally snuffs out these things.

They live on until the time is right and those changes can proceed without the largely pathetic barriers and excuses that are made by selfish people who hold power and cant or won’t get their collective heads around KAIZEN for our society.

Anyway, FWIW, I look forward to hearing and seeing Chanel continue to talk about this subject widely as that opens doors and brings people into the room who have wanted to be part of this conversation who will add their voices to the fray and keep the conversation moving.

Its all very exciting because I have been raving about sex education for the past 8 or more years.

We might actually get somewhere!

#cross-fingers!

#getinvolved

AES

I have used this track before but I just love it, so here’s another run…

Tears For Fears, Change

Keep it down! Why sales of silent sex toys are surging.

Hi all,

I came across this sex positive article in The Guardian and had to share it.

I love that this subject is being written about in tbe mainstream media.

The prudes can all go and jump off a jetty for all I care.
I want to see more of this.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/feb/22/keep-it-down-why-sales-of-silent-sex-toys-are-surging

Many thanks to the journo who researched and penned it and the subby for supporting stories like this.

I hope you click on through…

Regards
AES

https://youtu.be/kcPc18SG6uA

My porn life: what my years as a sex writer taught me about my desires.

Hi all,

This looks like another great read on the subject of subjects.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/feb/16/want-me-tracy-clark-flory-excerpt-sex-writer-reporter

I am off to find this book now and I hope after you have had a look at the link above, you might also.

Education is key to us finding real gender balance.

Regards
AES

Hedonism…

Hi all,

I came across this article today and I dug it and wanted to share.

Pleasure is one of the great loves of my life, so yes I think its fair to say I may just qualify as a hedonist.

https://theconversation.com/what-is-hedonism-and-how-does-it-affect-your-health-78040

Please have a read and I hope you enjoy it also.

Regards
AES

Why are increasing numbers of women choosing to be single?

Hi all,

Here’s a article that I found in Guardian Australia this morning as written by the author from her upcoming book:

Self Contained: Scenes From A Single Life by Emma John.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/jan/17/why-are-increasing-numbers-of-women-choosing-to-be-single

I really enjoyed this article.  I am not a single woman but have danced around many of the subjects discussed in this article over a number of years because I feel that all the points presented are very important for both genders across the board.

The message that I have tried to communicate is that marriage shouldn’t be the only option in our lives.  I strongly believe in this sentence.

And this article and I gather Emma’s book goes deeper to make this point albeit as a woman who understands the scope of the debate much better than I can and all the factors involved.

Please have a read of the article if this is something you think about on occasion.  Its really good food for thought.

Its also a subject poignant at the moment as the current Australian conservative government and their friends in supporting organisations seek to try on a proposal for people to stay in relationships for two years after trouble makes itself known.

This in my opinion is a bridge too far and it will be interesting if they seek to give it oxygen in this term of government.

Anyway, that’s me for this one.
Catch ya,

AES

Cyndi L – Speaking Truth

How I stopped feeling threatened by porn by Michelle Brown via Medium.

Hi all,

This is a good read IMHO.

Michelle opens up about pornography and how it has affected her.

And I can see how Women can feel like this, living and existing in a highly sexualized world where Women have to compete against a patriarchal regime that seeks to control them and their sexuality at every drop of the hat.

Thankfully, times are a changin and those trickle changes will continue to bring balance to the gender spectrum as the years go by.

https://link.medium.com/j3tKnwWjYcb

Please have a read of this link above (and support writers like Michelle) if you are interested in my primer noting that Medium is a paid subscription site.

I have barely touched on this massive subject with this post but maybe the subject interests you and you will dig deeper because to do so will take you on a great journey.

A journey that I hope makes our world a better place for all one day in the future.

“Democracy is and will always be, a work in progress”.

Cheers
AES

Deeper Underground…

I confronted my daughter’s boyfriend – but I was really confronting myself, via The Guardian Aust.

Hi all,


I loved this read and maybe you will find something in it also?

In my opinion, we men have a long way to travel to find gender balance and restore and reset the world that we have collectively steered towards catastrophe.

This read alludes to that journey and why it is so important to get on that track as soon as each of us can.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/oct/19/i-confronted-my-daughters-boyfriend-but-i-was-really-confronting-myself?CMP=Share_AndroidApp_Other

Please have a read if you have a few minutes.

Merry Christmas all,

AES