Good morning to anyone reading this…tis a Saturday morning here in downtown Melbourne, Australia and I feel like musing over the subject line for a bit.
Life begins at 40 is a memorable phrase (coined prior to 1932 apparently but made more widely known in that year by American shrink Walter Pitkin when he published a book of the same name) …anyways onto my little rant.
Yours truly was hoping that indeed this might be the case especially in regards to sex at 40 and onwards. I came to that conclusion based on the scenario in my mind that people around 40 have had their children or not and are mature enough and experienced enough to know what they want in regards to sex and thus might just go out and get it.
How bloody wrong was I!
I did the dating site thing for a while as I thought that might be a great way to find this sex at 40 but what I found was regular use of language such as this by 50% or more of single/divorced/available females in my area “No Players”, “If you want sex look elsewhere”, “Not interested in sex/one night stands”, and other statements which reflected to me that there is an awful lot of women who for whatever reason weren’t interested in sex.
Why is this?
My one and only Australian commenter thus far AOF has kindly educated me on oxytocin but this is as I understand it released into the bloodstream after sex not before….so what is it?…why are these women seemingly not interested in some simple sexual pleasure?
There are many factors that make up this argument I know and far too many to go into here but one major point that strikes me is this. Australians are not a very sexy people. We just aren’t liberal in regards to sex in OZ as I see it.
Australian men firstly, that being those that I have worked with, drank with, partied and conversed with don’t talk about sex in a calm rational way and or sexy way. Sex discussion has been (when I have been with the blokes) really only about (expletives included pretty much always) “who’s fucking who and who they want to fuck etc” which makes it easy to understand why women control sex in this country as I have raved on about before here http://tiny.cc/rc3cp
Australian men are cavemen still in regards to sex in the majority. Yes, things are changing and that gives me a great deal of hope but my god is it slow and it is going to take a whole lot longer than the 40 possible years I have left on the perch I fear! I was born too early!!!
Australian women, well…they are slowly working out what it is all about and seeking out there own sexual gratification, but there is still the fear purported in a large part by mothers I gather, the media and other organisations who would have women not do this as a rule. Furthermore, men haven’t done themselves any favours in being arseholes to women and any possible sexuality that they might been thinking about expressing. As per usual it is the old chestnut in it being the minority of men who have stuffed it up for the majority, case in point being the bloody church and its keep your legs closed unless you are married approach to sex and even then it should only be done in the bedroom with the lights out under the covers! Utter bullshit!
I am going to add to this also that women I would argue are their worst enemies a lot of the time and the example I intend to use here is a word “slut” that I know is used by a lot of men still unfortunately but it is certainly also used by a lot of women too…against other women!
There are but a few of the many factors that make up this massive pie graph. Overall though it is bloody sad in my humble opinion because as I have stated in a previous post, good healthy sex is wonderful for the body and mind and as far as I see if it is done safely then there is no issue full fucking stop! If we were to chill out on this a bit it might even raise the health of the nation by a few percentage points…for no cost!
So as for me finding willing sexual partners who just want to enjoy someone else’s body for a bit whenever the need strikes…possibly aint going to happen unless I move to France or Germany or another country that isn’t so uptight about sexuality.
And that is where I will end this little rant on thoughts about sex as I get older. It will always be a work in progress as are all posts in this blog. I am a seeker and I want to know more about Australians and sexuality so if you have something to add please offer a comment. It might just help me further define these thoughts.
Thanks to AOF also for recommending the book by Dossie Easton and Cath A Lizst…The Ethical Slut, A Guide To Infinate Sexual Possiblities. At least I can get myself educated on what polyamory is all about just in case I do meet some less uptight women…a bloke has gotta keep hoping!