In my first post on this subject I ranted on about how I thought Australians were backward in regards to sex. 90 odd posts later I still subscribe to that view. We for some reason in this country don’t consider this area of our humanity as all that important in the bigger picture which is a shame because I see our sexuality as playing a big part in our overall happiness, which segues into our work life, for lots our family life, and most importantly our health. That is how it feels for me and surely I cant be that far of the mark in making this statement?
Why is this?
In this country, women control sex. Men think they have power but in reality we don’t have shit except a bucket load of testosterone that we use with other aspects of our personality to appeal to women to give us a bit of the utopia that resides between their legs whenever they feel like it which in my case has been all too fucking rare. That story is retold by many a man in a myriad of ways every day, some more positive, some less so but it is the point that I wish to enshrine in neon that is women have the reins.
When I say control I would argue that the percentages of control are roughly speaking 70% for women and 30% for men although women would have you believe that they have no control…ha fucking ha!
Women have it all and they aren’t going to give any of it away in the name of balance anytime soon I think, well, at least that has been the case as I have seen it over the last 40 years anyway. And men for that matter are so fucking dumb when it comes to sex thinking with their second head most if not all of the time relying on their physical strength as a large wedge of the pie to get them through life…and I am no different, that I cant see us arguing for balance in the near future or even by the time I drop of the perch in hopefully another 40 big ones.
So that is the way it is. And within that construct we argue, and bicker constantly about who has that and who does this and blah blah blah, both sexes back and fucking forth…and nothing ever gets solved. Writers make a few quid out of it occasionally and sell a fair few copies of their books but do we really learn from all this wonderful thought….hmmm?
Don’t get me wrong, women aren’t these evil beings that seek to control sex…they just do as a default because there isn’t any education to speak of in regards to sex as I have rattled on about too many fucking times on this blog and so the cycle continues…females are born and learn from their mothers and then educate their offspring if they are females whilst men just sail along into the sunset eventually on their testosterone fueled super-yachts (as they see them) which are really nothing more than harbour tug boats in reality.
So where to for this country. Nowhere really I think. The all-pervasive anglo attitudes and centuries of conditioning (Thanks Kath Feeney – yes I pinched that…sooorry) that have us all in a bind are tied pretty fucking tight and they aren’t going to loosen anytime soon so change as far as I am concerned probably wont come. There are a FEW (LITERALLY) Australian sex writers talking about change in various forms but I would argue that no one is really listening if you look at the amount of comments these articles receive as an average….hell, take my blog as an example and a really fucking poor one at that….six measly comments none of which originate from Australia and thus therein lies my argument…Australians don’t give a shit about SEX.
Case in point, a mate made comment about the issue surrounding trans-gender folk and passports the other day something along the lines of….why are we these people complaining….I am sick of all these different types of people putting their hands up wanting something….?? (blood pressure rises) What The Fuck?
I treated the situation with kid gloves because I like the guy but for fuck’s sake….that attitude belongs in 1955….NOT 2011 AND he isn’t the only one who thinks and speaks this type of “bang a wedge in there cause I can” commentary.
But back to the above mentioned paragraph and where we are headed…nowhere as I mentioned above but to end this rant with something positive I will say that the potential for change is massive, and is I think in comparison with the icebergs that are mentioned floating away from both poles that have only a fifth of their real estate in perceptive view.
To realise change though we are going to have to go back to the basics and argue for a mandatory sex education program that starts kids off at the start of their respective journey’s when they are little tackers and ends when they leave high school. From there they are on their own but I would hope if the modules are put together right, kids will leave with a head full of knowledge about sexuality and how it affects us all and how best to make it through the minefield safely to the other side embracing whatever form of it you decide suits you.
Sure, education such as this might take away a bit of the mystery of sex but the positives in my very humble opinion will GREATLY outweigh little shitty negatives such as this.
I argue that education such as this will have real effects on Australian society and especially so if it embraces all the ground we have made thus far, one example being: workplace sexual harassment – which has been as far as I am concerned the biggest change in male/female relations since I have been around and working.
Go on people, read what I have crapped on about. I am not much of a writer but I am trying to put my thoughts out there in the hope that people will start to talk and join the dots. Interpret it as you wish and argue for change. Vote with your feet….The Australian Sex Party is a registered entity and I am sure if they were given the hint that there was a genuine groundswell massing in regards to a better sexual future for all in this country and especially so one that could be achieved via education in existing infrastructure they would take up the challenge and represent us as best they could. Sure, they would have their work cut out for them in competing against the two majors but as this current minority government has shown it isn’t impossible to argue for change and actually achieve some.
Anyway, I leave it with you as food for thought.
Oh, and if I piss anyone off, apologies in advance.
6 thoughts on “Australian’s and sexuality again…will anything ever change?”
The one who says “no” has the power. While it may seem from your point of view that tends to be the female prerogative, I can assure you there are plenty of Australian men who use denial of sex to control their female partners too.
Point taken and respected. I agree that there are men out there who do this but I would argue that they are in the minority. Females have the balance of power in regards to sex and possibly that is because they are much more responsible in regards to sexuality full stop. I have too many examples amassed over these 40 years to state otherwise. It just feels like that is the answer to me. Anyway, thanks for taking the time to drop a comment. As for the link to your page….what is up with that?
So how do we create a society where girls/boys/men/women don’t feel so disempowered that they have to use sex as a weapon? Surely the withholding of intimacy/pleasure/sex is tool of last resort in this dynamic. I don’t see this simplistically as being all about sex and power, rather it’s a symptom of something much greater in how we are socialised. If we find a way to nurture self-esteem, empathy and communication in girls and boys, it might be a good start.
Link? Late afternoon brain shut down most likely. Might work this time.
Interesting question…but before I go there, well done IRT your writing. You put a nice paragraph together. I carry on on a lot of my blogs about sex education and when I say that I mean really nitty gritty sex education at schools that is mapped out over the school year where the kids are given time to absorb and discuss with their peers/parents/teachers when they feel comfortable regards their particular situation. I would like to see this carried out every year of school starting at age 8 going right through until secondary school is finished. This has to be the central strategy if we are ever to upgrade society to version 2.0 IMHO. To cover this off however people are going to have to vote with their feet and by that I mean parents mostly are going to have to let go of the stranglehold on their collective ego’s and agree that education such as this is equally as important as mathematics and physics and sound english or whatever language you speak in school. Sorry, that is the best my simple brain can muster. Thanks again for making me think. Clyde p.s. Just reading your blog and see you are a Melburnian…woo-hoo, finally…an Australian has made comment. You are the best-est!
We could kill two birds with one stone and replace the school chaplaincy program (oh don’t get me started on that one..) with real relationship and sexuality education.
PS your comments looked a little lonely and in need of cheering up.
Feel free to write a post for DB sometime about being child-free if it moves you.
I am so there regards replacing the chaplaincy program. It might come eventually but OMG it is going to be a hard fight. The church is so firmly ensconced in the arses of both sides of politics that I cant see anything positive happening in my time on this wonderful planet. DREAMER ALERT: Wouldn’t it be wonderful to see this country embrace gay marriage, genuinely as a population accept the original inhabitants of this land, accept and make available to all euthanasia, legalise marijuana, build some injecting rooms and institute Australia wide sexual education! Now that would be a country I would be proud to live in. Thank you for the invite to write. I accept it gratefully with both hands and will start working on a post soonish. Regards, Clyde